Memories of Dad

Share your memories of Calvin Steussy, said Marti.

Dozens of people gathered tonight to say good-bye to my Dad...
...people from all walks of life - a brilliant surgical pathologist came and the guy who used to wax his cars.

Lab techs, his cleaning lady, doctors, friends, family - share your memories she said.

Where do we begin?

Tennis.

I think everyone in New Castle must have played tennis with my Dad.
And it was a memorable experience.
Because he loved it so much..and he so wanted to win!

He wanted to win so badly he would make faces at me from the net.
He taught Cally, Nic and me to play when we were just kids.

When I got older and better I might have been able to beat him. But if I got a lead he would clutch his chest looking pained. He knew I would let up on him rather than give him a heart attack.

Such was our father.

Scrabble?
He would memorize the grain on the tiles in order to draw the blanks.

Ping-pong? His spin was legendary.

Bowling - he would hurl the ball down the aisle at the Rose Bowl and finish with a dramatic one-footed hop at the  foul line.

He was the consummate competitor.

Books - you have rarely met a man who loved to read like my father.

When he and Mom travelled to Europe he would buy newspapers in languages he didn't know just to have a newspaper in hand.

My husband Tom's job the last few years was to get "Doc" books at the local library.

He kept Tom very busy.







When he was home sick with tuberculosis when I was 5 years old, he read me Goliath II every day.

He always read brother Ed Yertle the Turtle.



My KC tearfully remembered the book series he started her reading with his Christmas gift one year.

Christmas!

That was Dad's best time of year.

The munificent giver of gifts his sister said.


When we were young he would take us kids on a grand shopping trip to Pogue's in Cincinnati.

When he got old we reversed the process.

We took him shopping.

Nic would bring a wheelchair and wheel him into the center of Borders bookstore.

Dad would study intently all the books we brought him buying an individual book for all 5 of his kids, 15 grandkids, in-laws, Mother and of course, one for himself.

This year we got everything from Pat the Bunny to Warren Buffet.

Borders loved Dad.

And cars!

Dad loved his cars - when he got a new car he would coerce the lab girls to leave work and take a ride in his new car.

Judy remembers the scary time he wanted to demonstrate his new anti-lock brakes!

His work?
He loved to talk about his work.

When Cally brought her high school friend, Nancy, to dinner Dad regaled us with stories of his latest autopsies.

Nancy turned pale...then a little green.

I don't think she joined us for dinner after that.

What I loved best - what I will miss the most - was his wry sense of humor.
It was plain wicked.

When I first started taking dictation for him at the lab...

"I cut across the osteoporotic bone...that's B-O-N-E." he would explain helpfully.

Or my friend in high school Dad nicknamed Chip -
because he had all the breeding of a chipmunk.

And then he would chuckle.


Dad's greatest love of all was my Mother.

After 60 years together they were separated for a few months this year when she moved to Zionsville Meadows.

Finally in February he moved in there with her.

When sister Cally asked him what was his favorite part of living at ZM, she expected he would talk about the food, the support, the staff.

He said "The best part is living with Mother."

Dad loved to play with words and used large words in unusual ways.

"Mother" he said on the answering machine.
"Why are you watching that pedestrian baseball game, when there's great golf on channel 13?.....
Over and out!"

That was his last message.
We found it on her answering machine two days after he died.

It was so Dad.

I'm going to miss him.

We all are.

My Dad's Lab

I love the place I work.

Today I came into work sad about my Dad's death.

There in my office was a tree...

...a dogwood tree for me to plant in memory of my dad.

The lab techs loved my Dad.

He founded this laboratory 51 years ago. It was two rooms and a bunsen burner in the back of the hospital.

We still have people working here that he hired over 40 years ago.

He would go into the lab every weekend to kick the machines and talk to the girls...or kick the girls and talk to the machines
- I was never sure which.

I remember the first morgue.
It opened onto a public hallway with swinging bar doors.
One time he was doing an autopsy so gruesome he didn't want me to see it.
(At 16 I had already seen several).
He had me stand out in the hallway and take dictation as he worked in the morgue.
I think my imagination saw things worse than real life could ever have been.

He moved into "the new lab" about 35 years ago.
When I think of Dad I picture him in his wood panelled office with the piano-wood bookcases.

He would be at his microscope with an antique picture of his Mother, Helen Steussy, looking over his shoulder.

On the opposite wall were five oil pictures of his five children - beautiful Cally, solemn Nic, me, Ed looking silly and Chris looking angelic.
On his desk, his most prized photo - Miga, his dog.

Actually Miga was supposed to be my dog.
I remember going to get her at a farm near Greensburg.
She cried all the way home.
In the first unselfish act of my life I offered to take her back to the farm if she was miserable with us.

But by the next day she was wagging her tail and happy.
Smart dog, because she was well loved her whole life.
And she pretty much became Dad's dog.

She always knew when it was Wednesday because that was their day to go to the lake house.
She would greet him at the door and watch in anticipation as he filled the cooler with two steaks for the two of them.
One time she woke him up when a fire had started in the chimney.
Saved his life, he said.

When she died he had her cremated and kept the urn on his bookshelf.

Now Dad has died.
He, too, will be cremated.

His ashes will go to the family farm in New Glarus Wisconsin.

And we will plant an oak tree there - one that will cast a long shadow like my father.

And here in New Castle, close to my home, on my land, I will plant a dogwood tree...

...to remember my Dad forever.

Packing up the Old Family Home

What do I do with Garfield?

Kc won this silly huge stuffed Garfield at the Farmer's Pike Festival many long years ago.

How do I empty out this old house?



I signed the contract with the real estate agent...within 30 days of selling...vacate the premises.
There is no way!

I've been hauling away boxes and boxes to Goodwill, to the schools, to every charity that could use old clothes or Garfields.

And still the house is full...

...of so many memories.

Take pictures says Ann Landers.
Capture the memories on film.

Take pictures of the front porch where you ate so many family dinners.

On a warm summer evening we would eat corn on the cob as the neighbors wandered over to discuss the weather or the pets or the kids.

Can we take TJ's dogwood tree with us?

...or Crabby, the kids' favorite climbing tree?

Who else has snowflakes on the windows all year long?
















The art on the walls is absolutely priceless...

Some of the pictures I don't even understand.

It's amazing to see the floor of Alex and KC's room. When they lived here they were lucky to clear a path from the door to the beds.

Who wants the cat picture which has hung in Nicky's room for these many years?

Why is there a single shoe left in the bookcase?














And the great room...

Tom's chair sits empty. He sat here for every episode of Buffy and numerous viewings of Jaws.

He has sat in this chair with kitties on his lap and puppies and babies.
And every Christmas until 2009 he opened his presents here.

What do I do with Tom's old chair?

KC's chair...

I actually gave this to Tom 22 years ago as a present.

But somehow it became KC's chair in the last few years.
This is a chair that belongs in a big old family home full of kids, pets and neighbors.

Shrug it off, Helen.
Pack away all that junk to Goodwill.

The stuff doesn't matter!

It's the people that matter...
..and we're moving on.

Healthy Communities of Henry County

The best years of my life were with Healthy Communities!

We built the F.U.N. playground with the help of 2,000 volunteers.

Young and old - people from all walks of life and ability came together to construct this awesome playground in our public park in central New Castle.

I remember one girl, when we first opened the playground, gazing around in awe.

She told me in a hush - "I didn't know we kids in New Castle deserved something like this."

We led hundreds of kids every October on Walk to School day.


That one day of the year - accompanied by principals, parents, dogs and friends - the kids of New Castle would all walk to school together.

We planted trees with school kids every spring.

We helped with river clean-ups.




And we dreamed of bike trails.

What a difference a series of walking and biking trails could make to our community!

When we look at a map of square Henry County, we see abandoned railway corridors radiating from the center like the spokes of a bicycle.

The bike must have a flat tire because the bottom shows a flat east-west track along the old National Road.

A spoke going north-east could connect our county seat, New Castle, with the Cardinal Greenway leading to Muncie.

We could even have a river corridor along the Big Blue River starting at our YMCA.






I remember when I first joined this group there were only five members.


Thirteen years later you can see what we have accomplished.

A few years ago I had to leave Healthy Communities

I needed time with my family so my kids wouldn't be strangers when they left for college.




But the dreams and activities continue at Healthy Communities.

Their annual meeting Friday attracted nearly 60 people.

Last year they planted 700 trees.
They cleaned up the years of wear on the F.U.N. playground, now 10 years old.






And they opened the first of many trails.

They celebrated the benefit each trail brings to the people who live nearby.

One man attributes the Cardinal Greenway with saving his life.

A trail can help new businesses including the kid with the local lemonade stand.

The trails give people a great way to get exercise out in the fresh air....

...to socialize

...to enjoy life







Healthy Communities of Henry County is a wonderful group.

Join them and help make our little corner of this world a better place.